A major sponsor of the Conference was the Australian Catholic University (ACU), and Dr Clare Johnson the Director of ACU's Centre for Liturgy spoke to us briefly. The Centre for Liturgy offers Professional Development and Pastoral Training Programs as well as Academic programs. Part of that purview is Sacred Arts, although trying to get more information on that part of the programs proved elusive.

The first keynote address of the day was given by Dr Susan Timoney from Washington. You can find some of her thoughts on her blog, and via Twitter, and can learn more about her background on LinkedIn.

Dr Susan Timoney is the Secretary for the Secretariat of Pastoral Ministry and Social Concerns for the Archdiocese of Washington in the United States. In this capacity Dr Timoney is responsible for coordinating and implementations archdiocesan-wide evangelisation initiatives.

Her keynote address was entitled, 'The missionary mandate of the Parish: Christian life embedded in our neighbourhoods'

NB. These notes are rough, they do not contain everything she said, and will lack her particular emphases.

Good morning. I'm delighted to be here. I have a passion for helping people discover that what they hunger for most can be found in parishes and in relationship with Christ. I love parish life. I work with parishes to increase their capacity to evangelise.

verything depends on love, and we learn to give and receive love in the family and in the spiritual home that is the parish.

My dad had a life-long relationship with his parish, retaining it even after his parish merged with another one. He never lived more than 6 kms from the parish centre. He would say, 'As Iong as I can be buried from there – I will be OK.' Having lived on 4 continents, my life has been very different but I have always felt at home in the church wherever I have been due to the Eucharist and to the connectedness the Eucharist gives us to the universal church and everyone in it.

Parish is not principally a structure, but a family on fire with the Holy Spirit.

By nature a parish is situated in a neighbourhood and local. It is the home of 'resident aliens': members of a pilgrim Church. The mission of a parish is found living in the midst of its sons and daughters embedded in the life of a community. Embedded in the sense of how journalists were embedded with troops during the Afghanistan war.

The parish is a stable point of reference in the daily life of the Church's believers.

As parishes we need to be seen as contributing to the larger neighbourhood, and for that to happen attitudinal change is needed. Do we contribute to civic life or are we 'for members only'?

If as parishes we are inviting and welcoming we will become a bridge of encounter with the living Christ for others, and helping them deepen that encounter through worship, service, sacraments and education.

When some of our meeting room space is made available for public use by support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous, it can open doors for outsiders to encounter the life of the parish and through that to offer them the possibility of an encounter with the risen Christ. But it has to be done well and intentionally.

What could draw people back to our parishes?

A parish is called to serve the whole of the neighbourhood. St John XXIII had a vision for parish to be like the village fountain to which all would have recourse in their thirst. Before the days of running water in our homes, everyone would go to the fountain to get water and exchange community news. All of us thirst for God. Jesus is the One who quenches that thirst and we find Him in our Christian spiritual life.

We live in a world of increasing secularisation. As a society we have to choose whether to push God further to the margins or whether we will rediscover the wonder of God.

Many of the people around us have never been presented with the Gospel. So because they have less 'baggage' many of them have an unusual openness. We need to remember that those not with us are not necessarily against us.

There are three groups we need to reach
•Those who don't know Him at all
•Those who have been hurt by the Church or alienated from the Church
•Those who are active but don't see themselves as evangelisers

Each year the Archdiocese of Washington runs two big initiatives. For Christmas, targeting the first group is Find the Perfect Gift. It is an invitation to get to know more about Jesus Christ in the lead up to Christmas, with reflections and news about Advent events and Christmas Mass times. For Lent, targeting the second group is The Light is On for You. It is an invitation to return to the sacrament of Penance, with guides and information and especially confessionals open and ready on all the Wednesday nights during Lent.

We need to make things available for ALL to come and see.
What is the Gospel asking your parish to do now, and who to reach out to?

We have a program for those who say 'I want to find out more about the Catholic Church'.

Are we better at keeping our parishes running than at going out to evangelise? Jesus was always on the move, seeking out each and every person. As the Gospel of Mark shows us, He was always going out and saying, 'come and see', 'come and stay'.

When Mass ends we are told 'Go forth', 'Go and announce the Good News'. That is the task of the laity, to embed the life of the parish in our communities. We are the eyes, hands and feet of Jesus to those at home; in our jobs and in all the places we go.

We have to become more intentional about inviting people. Go. Invite. Welcome. That's the plan.

Give people an opening to ask questions and get engaged in conversation. It can go like this: A neighbour of mine walks his dog. We stopped to chat.
He said, 'What do you do?'
'I work for the Catholic Archdiocese of Washington'.
'Oh, so you work for the Catholic church.'
'Yes.'
'Do you believe? Do you believe all of it?'
'Yes, it has the best answers to the most important questions.'
That was 9 years ago. Now he begins a conversation with me about anything Catholic that has been in the news.

We need to engage the missionary consciousness that was given to us all in baptism. We also need to assess the capacity of our parishes for evangelisation. How many in our parishes have been evangelised? How many are evangelisers?

We can go out, because He has loved us first.

By and large we seem to take our cues from the secret service; we are present, silent and watchful.

Institutions don't help the encounter with Jesus Christ to happen, but the people who work in them do.

Missionary Disciples
• Are co-responsible for the mission, and alive to the opportunities that present themselves around the kitchen table, at BBQs, and while getting ready for Mass.
• Are heralds of hope. When Benedict XVI visited America there were banners around the place with the message, 'People with hope live differently'. Recently I was talking with a young lady at one of our RCIA classes and I asked her why she came. 'I never have serious conversations with my friends. They are interested in the latest movie and pedicure etc. I am desperate for serious conversation about things that matter.'
• Share the Good News. We are always missionary disciples. If you look at the people who encountered Jesus in the Gospels, they in turn evangelised others.

Assess the quality of welcome.
Do the demographics in your parish reflect the face of the neighbourhood. Is it the same mix of people you see in the grocery store or not? Does the vestibule of your church have a 'welcome' vibe for any newcomer at your front door? Does it contain information helpful for a newcomer? How much do you speak in acronyms, eg 'YAM is having a sausage sizzle after the 6pm Mass next week.' Could you guess that YAM stood for Young Adult Ministry? Could a newcomer guess that that?

It matters how our communications with those on the fringe are framed. Is it like, 'We look forward to learning with you and your child in the sacramental preparation program'? Or is it like, 'You need to do X, Y and Z to get enrolled in the sacramental preparation program by ddmmmyyyy.'?

Is there a link between your parish and the community? Do you have brochures about your parish available in local cafes? Are some of your parish events being promoted through community email 'What's On' style lists? Do you have 'Come and join us for Christmas Mass' messages in the local newspaper?

Pope Francis believes that our parishes have great flexibility. “The parish is not an outdated institution; precisely because it possesses great flexibility, it can assume quite different contours depending on the openness and missionary creativity of the pastor and the community.”Evangelii Gaudium 28

Parishes are flexible and adaptive because they can respond to needs that are local. Effective responses require pastoral planning. A parish that is missionary knows that it is the work of every one and every ministry. To assess the calibre of a parish's ministries, compare them with what a secular organisation (eg Red Cross) achieves.

If your parish is located in a poor neighbourhood, then it is likely to have a food program. But thought should be given to how the parish could help those coming to the food program to encounter Jesus. Maybe one way is having the church doors open, and soft background music.

If your parish has a powerful preacher, record some of them onto DVDs and have them available as 'take home' material. At the same time have some 'How to learn more' material available too.

We take our 8th graders on a retreat day. We ask them what they want as part of that retreat day, and the top answer is Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament.

The Washington Archdiocese has developed an 'Indicators of Vitality' self-assessment tool for parishes. It consists of 12 questions covering each of the areas of Worship, Education, Community, Service, and Administration. The 24 page PDF guide to the Indicators of Vitality tool is here and is in both English and Spanish.

Worship: With regard to worship, how is your Mass schedule meeting the needs of your neighbours? We are finding that Sunday evening Masses are getting more popular.

Education: Adult education needs to have a variety of opportunities and schedules. We found that a lot of men still wake up as early on Saturday mornings as they do for the weekday commute to work. So we offered a bible study group for men at 5.30am on a Saturday morning followed by 7am Mass and 150 men made the commitment.

These days it seems like people are busier, and lifestyles have changed. It is not that they don't have a desire for the things of God, it is just that it is seen as a luxury.

Community: How are we building fellowship and communion?

Service: These are our works of mercy. Who are the most vulnerable in our community? And how are we meeting their needs? Who is on the periphery of your community? The answers will be different for each parish. It might be those suffering as a result of domestic violence, it might be young adults, it might be migrants.

Administration: The goal is the best match of resources for ministry. Dare to change the conversation, and commit to praying and discerning where the Lord is drawing our parish community.

Moving a parish from maintenance to mission is not a short term goal. No one program will do it for you. Generally it takes around 100 years for a Council to bear fruit in the life of the Church. Because of Vatican II the 21st Century church is better fitted for preaching the Gospel to the people of the 21st century.

Evangelii Gaudium 28
The parish is not an outdated institution; precisely because it possesses great flexibility, it can assume quite different contours depending on the openness and missionary creativity of the pastor and the community. While certainly not the only institution which evangelizes, if the parish proves capable of self-renewal and constant adaptivity, it continues to be “the Church living in the midst of the homes of her sons and daughters”. This presumes that it really is in contact with the homes and the lives of its people, and does not become a useless structure out of touch with people or a self-absorbed group made up of a chosen few. The parish is the presence of the Church in a given territory, an environment for hearing God’s word, for growth in the Christian life, for dialogue, proclamation, charitable outreach, worship and celebration. In all its activities the parish encourages and trains its members to be evangelizers. It is a community of communities, a sanctuary where the thirsty come to drink in the midst of their journey, and a centre of constant missionary outreach. We must admit, though, that the call to review and renew our parishes has not yet sufficed to bring them nearer to people, to make them environments of living communion and participation, and to make them completely mission-oriented.
…………………………………………………………………….
Participants at the Conference were then asked to reflect and talk about the following two questions:

Q. What is the greatest challenge for evangelisation in your neighbourhood?
Q. What tools or encouragement might you take from Dr Timoney's presentation to respond to that challenge?

For our area it would be the commuters who regularly spend more than 3 hours a day travelling between home and work. It means that weekday and weeknight events in the parish are largely unattainable to them, and for a sacrifice of weekend time to be considered the offerings have to be truly excellent and not the mediocre 'going through the motions' stuff that seems to be the norm. To get them back, nothing short of excellence will do.
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My response

While I am convinced that there need to be better communication channels and personal encounter experiences between the parish and the community, I am not convinced that having non-parish groups meeting in parish premises is the way to go. That's even if it is done intentionally and with a plan for engagement with the non-parish group. With Rebuilt and Divine Renovation ringing in my ears, I know that such plans tend to be fruitless in bringing people to Jesus. Surely even the most basic bible study group or catechist meeting is going to be doing a better job at making disciples than a secular support group. Parish resources are too few to squander in the hopes that someone coming to a secular event might pop in and pray inside the church.

I also have Pope Francis ringing in my ears saying that the Church cannot and must not become an NGO (Non-Government Organisation). Our works of mercy must be full of the tenderness that is lacking in secular charities and must be offering encounters with Jesus as well as assisting those in need. How easy it is for a work of mercy to start the right way, and over time to become more bureaucratic and secular! Seeking government grants to assist with the funding tends to be the start of the slippery slope. The Saints got around the funding needs of their works of mercy through intense prayer and dependence on Divine Providence.

Getting the balance right between works of mercy and outreach, and between evangelisation and formation/catechesis is the challenge. They are more of those 'both/and' things that are so typically Catholic: 'faith and works', 'virgin and mother', 'human and divine', 'scripture and tradition'.

That said, the need to be more visible and accessible to the neighbourhood is crucial. Staffing information booths at the local agricultural Show, having a contingent at the local dawn Anzac Day services, recruiting a parish team for participation in charitable events (walkathons, Fun Runs) or sporting competitions, are options. As are posters in shop windows for guest speakers or Christmas and Easter Mass times in the local press and online.

I'd like to see something like 'The Light is On for You' initiative happening here, too. Having churches open for prayer and the Sacrament of Penance on Wednesday nights during Lent seems quite do-able, and would be helpful for commuters and shift-workers.

The story of the young woman desperately hungry for conversations about stuff that matters resonated with me. I'd prefer to have conversations at that level all the time, but they tend to be few and far between even in parish life. Our monthly study group on Evangelii Gaudium is one of those few places.

I did go looking on the Washington Archdiocese website for information on a 'I want to find out more about the Catholic Church' program. It sadly wasn't immediately obvious. It wasn't in the FAQ section. You had to go to Education/Adult Faith Formation/Faith Foundations to find it. I had to scroll to the bottom of the Home page to find 'Interested in Becoming Catholic', but that wasn't exactly the question I was asking, and the text on that sub-page didn't provide a link to Faith Foundations.

​Could someone visiting your parish or diocesan website be able to find answers to both questions: 'How do I find out more about the Catholic Church?' and 'If I am interested in becoming Catholic, what do I need to do?'
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In the next issue will be notes from the keynote speech of Daniel Ang on evangelisation strategies for Australian parishes.

Here's the Divine Renovation challenge – as set out in Chapter 7's musings on Leadership.

'We should all take the time to write down a one-page description of a future of our diocese, parish or ministry that excites us. Do not be distracted by the obstacles and challenges; just write down your dream…..Once you have written down your vision statement, write down your own personal purpose statement that will define your ministry (in one sentence).'
 
Having read Divine Renovation for the first time back in late April/early May 2016, recently I have been re-reading it as time permits. Having got to the part (above) in Chapter 7, it looks like a good exercise to do even though I know there is no visible hope of seeing it happen.
 
Here goes: a blue-sky wish list for my parish.
 
I want to see Perpetual Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament begun and kept going, so that at any time of the day or night there are at least two people praying in the Blessed Sacrament chapel providing the open doors so that anyone, whoever they are, can have access to the Heart of Jesus when they are in distress.
 
I want to see the 30 minutes prior to the start of Vigil Mass on Saturdays as a time of testimonies from regular attendees at that Mass and prayers. To get a car park in the church grounds people have to arrive 30 minutes before anyway. That would give time for 2 x 10 minute testimonies. The first one sharing about what God's grace has done in his or her life. The second one sharing about the ministry/career/vocation that God called them to, how they found it and what good things are happening in that ministry/career/vocation. The remaining 10 minutes would have prayer teams out in the gathering area for anyone who wanted prayer for a special intention.
 
I want to see a social media ministry active and effective. It would be a ministry with several parts. One part would be dedicated to teaching people how to use social media for soft evangelization. Another part would be dedicated to regularly and consistently producing parish based 'good news' content: getting the photos and the stories from parish events and from parish people. A third part would be collecting and sharing the best Catholic content online each week. The final part would be assisting and supporting parishioners in sharing their own faith journey online via blogs etc.
 
I want to see intercession as a top priority across the board. For starters at least 10 minutes of prayer prior to the start of any meeting – be it parish council, finance committee, liturgy team, children's ministry, study groups, Lenten groups etc. Using prayer that includes scripture, begging God's blessing and guidance upon the meeting's activities, and praying for the people that the meeting serves. Without the power of God we can do nothing.
 
I want to see at least one prayer group operating each week, where people are free to come and pray their hearts out in whatever manner they wish: A prayer group that prays specifically for the parish as a whole and for each individual or family who asks for prayers: A place where people are free to dance and sing, to sob and groan, to kneel and beg, to call on God to act in their lives and in the lives of their loved ones, and to learn how to praise and thank Him too.
 
I want to see new forms of parish outreach to the community develop. It might start with once a month setting up a table in the local shopping centre and at the once a month market days and car-boot sales days that happen locally.
 
I want to see religious art with evangelistic potential celebrated. All too often I have art shows billed as religious art with barely anything worthy of the name on display. Subject matter would have to be directly inspired by Scripture, the Catechism or the Lives and Writings of the Saints. Twice a year the parish could have a regular booking with the regional art gallery for exhibition space. Then the artists (poets, illustrators, fine artists, printmakers, fabric banner designers, quilters, ceramic artists, sculptors, animators etc) with the most potential to bring people to Jesus with their creative talents could be invited to set up a display of their work, one artist per one weekend a month in the gathering area of the parish church.
 
I want to see people in the pews discovering the God given talents they have been given, and assisted to find creative ways of using them to help bring others to Jesus. Regular offerings of Clifton StrengthsFinder groups and discussions with trained coaches would make that happen.
 
I want to see the rest happen too: car park ministry; outside the doors of the church welcoming ministry (in addition to the inside the doors of the church welcoming ministry); sacramental preparation that evangelizes and converts; youth groups that really produce missionary disciples; homilies that actually touch the heart and draw listeners closer to God; encouragement of devotional practices; greater inclusion and access for those with autism, lower mobility, reduced sight and hearing abilities etc.

Yes, that was one A4 page worth.
 
My personal purpose?
The short answer is, I don't know.
Although I have more clues than at any previous time in my life, I cannot yet see how it is all supposed to come together – and that's despite working on it and bringing it to prayer for the last 9 months.

Fr Mallon's personal purpose statement went like this:
"To be a catalyst for the renewal of my parish and of the broader Church."

Over to you. Do some dreaming and some writing of your own.

​Then as Fr Mallon suggests, if you are in leadership, share it and get feedback on it and refine it. 

Workshop 2D – The Joy of Love: Evangelising Parishes though the Family and the Couple.

This workshop was led by Francine and Byron Pirola, directors of the Marriage Resource Centre. For 28 years they have been married, and have been blessed with 5 children and an international ministry.

You can follow them under Smart Loving MRC on Facebook and Twitter.

Thank you for coming to this workshop. Why did you choose us?
•We want more for the families doing baptismal preparation, to help plug them into parish life
•We belong to Teams of Our Lady, and are looking for more input
•The topic of the Joy of Love was enough to get me here
•I have a young family, and I'm feeling alone
•Our parish has lots of young families
•Family is the domestic church, so family is crucial
•I'm looking for tips on how to help 3 adults in my life to choose Jesus
•I want to know how to improve on 42 years of marriage
•I want to find out how to engage the families who only seem to show up for sacraments and are never seen again.

In this workshop we'd like to achieve 3 things:
•Give you a fresh mindset for family and parish
•Reflect on Pope Francis' post-synodal apostolic exhortation Amoris Laetitia
•Get practical with ideas for what you can actually do in a parish
Family as a force for Evangelisation

Gifts vs Needs.
We can choose to see the families in our parishes as gifts and resources, and not as consumers of resources. The charity model breeds dependency and encourages people to say, 'What's in it for me?'. We have grown up seeing ourselves as consumers, rather than seeing ourselves as co-responsible for the mission of the Church.

'What's in it for me?' thinking actually encourages criticism and comparative evaluation. We can't win that kind of competition. The lure of the beach or the sleep-in eventually wins out.

We need to see families as agents for evangelisation. This requires lay leadership. Inspired by priests, supported by religious, - but done by laity. For this shift in thinking to happen, we have to start searching for the gifts.

Families evangelise in the ordinary
•They disciple their children, and pass on the faith to them
•They disciple the friends of their children, and the families they come from
•They give hospitality and welcome

Our family homes contain the expression of our faith as the domestic church. Somehow we seem to have forgotten the impact of opening up our homes and have got into the thinking that our homes are not good enough and that everything has to take place in parish meeting rooms. Why is it that we seem to have lost the art of hospitality? Let's start seeing our homes once more as places for evangelisation.

When we go to a zoo, we see the giraffes and lions in artificial environments. It is only when you go on safari that you get to see them in their natural environments. The way we experience those animals and the way we relate to them in those environments is completely different. In the same way, a parish meeting room or gathering area is an artificial environment for experiencing and relating to family life.

In our homes, every day, there are at least a dozen evangelising opportunities: tradesmen, postman, passers-by while gardening, children, relatives, phone calls etc.

A friend of ours who believes in the sacrament of marriage has a dream. He'd like to stand at the door of the church on Sunday mornings and ask each married couple how they would rate their passion for each other on a scale of 0 to 10. For anything less than an 8, he would send them home to the bedroom to work things out – so they could come back and celebrate Eucharist properly.

With happily married couples in our pews, our churches would be full with the people who want what they can see we have in the joys of married love.

Our primary evangelising unit is the family.

When we go to Mass we sit together, we go up to Communion together, and we are warm and responsive to each other. Just doing this makes us witnesses to God's love in a gentle natural way.

However we do have to stop and remember what we are about. We have to make real choices. I can choose to pick at the faults of my wife every day OR I can be surprised that this wonderful woman is still with me.

The families in our pews are the biggest gift we have.

Amoris Laetitia by Pope Francis
What an extraordinary document! It is not a hard read, but it is a long read.

Pope Francis uses two images of the Church. The first is the Light on the Hill, where truth is emphasised: teaching, doctrine, vision, ideals for holy living. The second is the Field Hospital, where hope is emphasised. A Church that ministers to the wounded, and accompanies them, and embraces the process of gradualism (it will take many steps in the right direction, but we'll take it one step at a time). Imperfect love is still valuable. A field hospital deals with the reality of life as it is.

There is a gap between our ideals (Light on the Hill) and the reality (Field Hospital). There is a gap between teaching and practice. What are our options?
•Change the teaching? No
•Shout it louder? Make it clearer? No
•A third way, according to the call of Pope Francis.

Archbishop Prowse uses the analogy between referee and coach.
Referee: defines the rules, pulls up players when the rules are broken.
Coach: encourages and supports, seeks to help players improve performance.
We need BOTH.

Anyone who has raised a child  - is a skilled evangelist.
That's because they understand that there is a process: Just as there are stages in teaching a child how to cross a road safely there are stages in bringing someone into full relationship with Jesus: 1) Don't cross the road 2) Look right, look left 3) Be careful 4) Go for it. The process works because we take them on a journey, and we share our life with them.

If we really understood the Eucharist, we would crawl on our knees in unworthiness. Yet so many of us look at the Eucharist with the wrong lenses: 'It is a right. I've earned it.' We are worried sick about those who do not understand, but we choose to love them and work with them.

When you hear a homily at Mass on Sunday, are you listening with the ears of criticism or with ears open to being challenged?

Back in the Parish: Practical Tips
It is time to see more married leadership in the Church. It will be good for the couples, and good for the Church because it will utilise the charisms of marriage that don't burn out.

We have to see marriages as evangelising opportunities.

Go looking for the sacramental charisms that come from the sacrament of marriage, and that become operative when the couple is ministering as a couple.

It is no longer the case that just showing up is the right qualification for any kind of ministry.

The gift of charisms is part and parcel of the sacrament of marriage. There is the inner dimension for the couple, and the outer dimension for the Church. The graces are given not just for us as a couple, but for the whole Church as well.

How many married couples are on your parish council? How often do we put individuals into roles of service and not the married couple he or she is part of? It happens because we don't think of the married couple as an evangelising unit. Their sacramental witness of their married love is what makes them God-like – because there the power of the Holy Spirit is active.

When we do things from our own skills and strengths, we burn out. However, if we minister from spiritual and sacramental charisms, we don't burn out.

When we are together, we are nicer together. We pull each other up gently and effectively. For example, if a wife is present at a meeting with her husband, and he is beginning to ramble, by a gesture she can get that message through and acted upon - before the others at the meeting get restless. We are much better people together than individually.

How to find them
Pick busy people, because they are natural leaders. Look for couples that radiate energy, joy and love. Affirm them. Tell these couples that you need them, and why you chose them. 'You have a gift. We need you'.

Don't ask for volunteers. If you do that you won't get the best, you will get people with spare time.

Seek people who are joy-filled. Don't get old grumpy-pants.

Think about picking married couples to lead ministries.

When faced with a choice between couples with the sacramental impact of holiness or couples with secular skills, go for the ones with holiness. You want the ones that make you say, 'They are great to be around', not the ones who make you say, 'I'm so glad I'm not like them'.

Marriage Mission Team
Every parish should have a Marriage Mission Team, who can plan, build and grow the marriage mission.

To begin with you need at least 2 married couples in each parish. No committees and no reports are required. What are needed are eyes that are out and about seeking talent in other married couples: Couples that can recruit other couples as parish mentors for younger couples, and who will continue to affirm and support the recruited couples.

Initiatives can be added. Events for anniversaries, Valentine's Day, Blessings for the Engaged (we need to celebrate them and pray for them).

On average couples spend 30 seconds a day in personal intimate conversation. Aim for 4 minutes a day. The biggest impact is from 0-10% not from 90-100%.

Tell your families in the parish how stunning they are. Tell them.

The best most dramatic results come from marriage preparation that is married couple community based. The resources are there, not just in the couples already in your parish but also the very good married couple community based programs that are available to help them.

Affirm your married couples in their greatness.

Smart Loving is the result of 20 years of work developing parish based marriage preparation courses. This couple to couple mentoring program is now available in an online version, accessible cheaply and easily. The programs for both the engaged and the married are successful in helping them as couples and in engaging them in parish life.

50% of separations happen in the first 5 years of marriage. That's why a safety net for the newly married in their home communities is so desperately needed. Marriage Mission Teams and Smart Loving programs are ways to provide this.

A question was asked about how to deal with the battle of weekend sport and keeping the family unit together for Sunday Mass. The answer was to start small. It really helps finding another family, and working out which Mass both families could go to together.
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My response

This was an eye-opening workshop.

So what are the charisms of marriage, and what should we be looking for?

"Some people have an extraordinary gift of making people feel welcome, at home, and loved. When I was a seminarian, a Catholic family welcomed me and several others from the seminary into their home for fellowship and relaxation each Friday evening. The experience of their home had a significant effect on my life. They welcomed us as if we were Christ and we were all built up in the Spirit as a result. Hospitality flowed from their charism of marriage (see 1 Cor. 7:7) which they regularly nourished and exercised. It was the first time I saw married life with Christ as the centre, lived out as a prophetic sign. Their life together was so radical and open to others that on feast days they could sometimes have up to 22 people around the table basking in the warmth of their home." Marcellino D’Ambrosio 11 May 2016

Unity: The gift of being one in mind, heart and body.
Procreation: The gift of welcoming new life.
Reconciliation: The gift of restoring relationship.
Hospitality: The gift of welcome and belonging.
Nurture: The gift of care and education.
Fidelity: The gift of faithful dedication.
Generosity: The gift of sharing without reserve.
Mercy: The gift of forgiveness.
Friendship: The gift of companionship and encouragement.
http://cathfamily.org/the-charisms-of-marriage/

And it might look like this: (from the same link given above)

Sarah and Henry are passionately committed to growing deeper in intimacy. Following prostrate surgery that left Henry impotent, they persisted in seeking new ways to express their unity. Their joyfulness is contagious.

Michelle and Mark have four children. Their home is an open door for the parish youth who are often found at the family table talking to Michelle and Mark about important life decisions.

John and Barbara are the focal point of their parish community, welcoming people each Sunday by name and serving refreshments afterwards. They are often the first ones people call when there is a pastoral crisis.

But there definitely isn't enough research around into the ways that the Holy Spirit gifts married couples as married couples for the good of the Church. There must be other charisms of marriage that we have yet to discover because we haven't been looking for them, calling them forth and celebrating them.

I do think they are right, and that the time has come to treasure the couples living out the sacrament of marriage among us, to call them forth, and to help them to shine and put their married charisms at the service of the Church's mission to make disciples. They are our very best response to the crazy political ideologies of our day.

Our homes should be the hubs of where the evangelistic action is, with less reliance on the parish office and parish meeting rooms. Romans 12:13b 'You should make hospitality your special care', is a call from God through St Paul that we need to be more responsive to. It is something that I have been doing less of, and that needs to change.

What a difference it would make to the effectiveness of our parishes in bringing people to Jesus if we took seriously 'our primary evangelising unit is the family'!

Big positive changes would happen too if we kept on the lookout for people on whom the Holy Spirit is bestowing charisms (individuals and married couples) and encouraged them to use those special gifts for the good of others.
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Marriage Mission teams sound like a very good, very workable and very fruitful idea to implement in parishes.
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In the next issue will be notes from the keynote speech of Dr Susan Timoney on parish outreach to neighbourhoods.